REFLECTION on Chapter 2

REFLECTION on Chapter 2

Marriage is a serious covenant according to the word of God; it is not to be taken lightly. Until this day, I am still trying to figure out why I married the woman who I allowed myself to become involved with. In fact, some of my friends told me that they don’t know how I endured this kind of verbal abuse during those years of marriage. It was a deceptive and manipulative scheme tied in the fiery chains of Satan himself. The marriage lasted five years, and those were years of stress, anxiety, and pressure coming at me from every angle in life. It felt as if every nerve in me was about to unravel while travelling back and forth to Nassau having to deal with my lawyer and the Judge concerning the divorce proceedings.  A final separation from someone is never easy, and can send you into a state of depression.  Your whole world crumbles leaving you to feel as if you will not live to see another day. It feels as if there is nothing in your life worth living for, and you just sit there in space with your head devoid of all thoughts. Even though I had the support of my family and friends, detaching yourself from someone after being together for a number of years was not stress-free. Often emotional waves would sweep over me and I would shed tears, curled up in a corner of the back bedroom on the floor. On the heels of the stress and anxiety from the divorce, the moderate alcoholic drinking turned into average alcoholic drinking, and was on its way to becoming intense alcoholic drinking.  Looking back on this time, I can see that I only professed to know Christ with my lips. I had head knowledge of Him, but no heart knowledge, which I needed so badly.